Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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