That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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