i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Randomize
