where am i from again
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
