Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(585): View more from New York

i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"

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(303): View more from Colorado

I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....

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(406): View more from Montana

I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.

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(303): View more from Colorado

why does he always try to puke into shot glasses

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(507): View more from Minnesota

Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"

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(708): View more from Illinois

I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.

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(504): View more from Louisiana

it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack

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