I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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