I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I am naked and annoyed.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Randomize