I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
