Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
