I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Randomize