love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
