You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
50% drunk capacity currently
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
These tits shall not be calmed
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize