I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize