Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
This is the high leading the old right now
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Randomize
