508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
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