brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
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