But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
