SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
