She's JV to your varsity
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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