question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
