I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
