i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
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