real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Sext me about skeletons
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
