i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
You did what with his pubic hair?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
