Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
