you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
