he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Randomize
