Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
