i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
