Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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