You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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