She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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