it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Bring me that man meat
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
My bed smells like the plague
Randomize