I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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