i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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