the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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