Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
