She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
