well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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