it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
