Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
