I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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