forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
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