Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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