That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize