I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
