Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize
