dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
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