seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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