do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
