4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize
